So long Zeros – We’re Ready for the 10’s!

It’s that time of year again…time to say farewell to this year and usher in the new one. A new decade in fact.; the 10’s (if that’s what we’re calling them.) Was it a whole ten years ago we were all running around worried about potential Y2K disasters? Yep, 1999 was ten years ago. I recall when that Prince song came out in the 80’s thinking that 1999 and the year 2000 were so far off. And speaking of the 80’s I actually remember NYE 1979 as a kid; I was watching a show and the Village People were singing a song about being ready for the 80’s. Apparently now stuff from the 80’s is considered retro. Much like when I was a kid 50’s stuff was considered oldies. Now that I’ve confirmed my antiquity here and depressed myself a little with that little trip back in time, let me get on with my point.

Like many other people I’m sure, I’m hoping this new year and new decade bring many positive changes. So many have experienced the various trials and calamities of the economy and we were certainly no exception. However, necessity is the mother of invention and thus we’ve actually been led into a brand new venture that we’ll be sharing with you. We’re looking forward to announcing the details here shortly after the New Year so stay tuned.
Here’s to a happy New Year!

I should be so lucky

You may recall in my numerous posts about weight loss my mentioning that the Hubby currently has me beat in this department. I don’t know exactly how he did it, but he managed to drop somewhere in the neighborhood of 50 pounds. Meanwhile, I’m still struggling to lose the rest of my weight. But that’s beside the point. Hubby’s weight loss resulted in dropping a pants size. Well, technically it was more than one pants size, but we all know when men gain some weight they refuse to go up a size and just squeeze into their current pants hoping to lose the weight at some point. So, all his pants were too big. And because he also didn’t want to rush out and buy pants in his new, smaller size he decided to just use a belt. Of course, he needed new belts because the old ones were too big. So this brings me to his recent business trip. During the airport security portion of his check-in he set off the metal detector with his new belt. This resulted in having to remove the belt. Can you see where I’m going with this? That’s right, his pants fell down. Right down to ankle level while bending over to remove his shoes. Apparently the removal of one’s belt, shoes, keys, and laptop out of the bag is not only a huge hassle under normal circumstances, it’s downright impossible while trying to hold your pants up. It’s also hilariously entertaining to the other passengers waiting in line. Frankly, I can hardly see straight to type this I’m laughing so hard and I wasn’t even there to witness it.

But of course, the real issue here is my intense jealousy over my husband’s ability to even have this problem in the first place.

Christmas Cuteness and Holiday Happenings

I’d love to share with you all a witty take on The Night Before Christmas complete with amusing anecdotes about last minute gift wrapping, baking, and housecleaning mixed with holiday merriment, but since I didn’t have time to write it (what with all the last minute gift wrapping, baking, housecleaning and holiday merriment) I thought I’d share some pictures of the season.

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For those regular readers and friends and family who are aware of our usual Christmas Tree tradition, I thought I'd let you know that for once we actually found a tree we liked that was tall enough and cut it down this year. Yes, it's a Christmas Miracle.

Also, Teenager is especially festive sporting a Rudolph-like pimple on the end of his nose, however he refused to allow a photo and my pleading “Come on! It’s for the blog!” seemed to make no difference to him. Teenagers.

Merry Christmas everyone!

Non-Soliciting Solicitors

I may as well hang a sign that says “Please solicit our home - I’m begging you”.
What is it with door-to-door salespeople/solicitors of various descriptions ignoring the basic “No Soliciting” request? I love the various excuses for why their particular activity is not “soliciting”. The “free” offers, the surveys, fund raisers, donations to charity requests and our personal favorite, religious recruitment.

One of the new things seems to be offering to clean your carpet for free—one room—I suppose just so you’ll realize how filthy the rest of it is and be willing to have the whole house cleaned right at that point. I enjoy it when the free carpet cleaning guys come around now because they have no comeback upon hearing: “Oh, I’m sorry, we have no carpet- it’s all wood floors.” Ha!

But we do get annoyed at the myriads of supposedly non–soliciting solicitors who show up despite our sign. Over the years the hubby and I have discussed various possibilities for an effective No Soliciting sign.

I’ve thought about simply spelling it all out:


But then I realized I need to make exceptions for Girl Scouts and their delicious cookies as well as some religious organizations because frankly, hubby loves the debates and it gives him something fun to do.

Then the hubby comes up with more strongly worded ideas such as:

I however have come up with a more productive idea:

And if that’s not enough to make them turn and run:

Your chance to own an original piece of artwork

So here’s the deal folks: little guy recently brought home this painting from school:

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and where most “artwork” he does is a scribble here and there, I looked at this and thought it was pretty creative. I’ve seen things in art galleries that actually looked like they were done by a three year old at pre-school, so I turned to the hubby and said jokingly that we should auction it off on eBay. He of course laughed and he’s still laughing. But then I thought about all the ridiculous crap people actually do sell on eBay; about this time a couple years ago it was the postcards from Poland prank. There are numerous items people claim are “haunted” or contain the spirit of their dear departed Aunt Matilda that they want to unload. And it seems like every time we turn around we hear about yet another grilled cheese sandwich or piece of toast containing the image of Jesus or the Virgin Mary. So why not? At this point, it’s more or less another one of my hair-brained ideas and I know this. If you want to take a look at the eBay listing it’s here. The auction ends two days before Christmas. The hubby says if it actually sells “it will be a Christmas miracle”.

Christmas Decor gone Awry

The Hubby and I go through the same dialogue every year when he goes to hang the lights on the house. Basically, it involves several minutes of me saying; "Be careful! Don't fall off the ladder!" and him saying; "Yeah, yeah, yeah" "I'll be fine!" So when a family member sent the following "Christmas Decor" photo we cracked up.


Diversity from a Toddler's POV

Little guy was busily playing with his cars and the various people he likes to load into the vehicles to go for a ride. When we saw this particular carload we cracked up; a pink Jeep filled with a dragon, a blonde, a dog and a Gnome. Honestly, it does not get any more diverse than this!

Averting your Eyes for the Thighs

Has this ever happened to you? Let’s say your thighs are not your best feature. Let’s say you are the “pear shaped” sort who gains your weight in your hips/thighs rather than around the middle (apple). Now let’s say you gained an inordinate amount of pregnancy weight and it all went to your thighs. Okay, maybe a tiny bit formed a small “muffin top” but the vast majority; thigh city. And by "city" I mean they could claim to be their own city, each of them. So, you are forced to buy bigger pants because you know, you have to wear pants. And it goes a little something like this; enter dressing room, take off existing pants and close your eyes because you do not want to see your thighs in the “funhouse” mirror complete with fluorescent lighting and the extra special rear view you get from the mirrors at all angles. So you do this little thing where you say quietly to yourself “Don’t look, don’t look, just don’t look!” And then, because it’s like a train wreck type scenario, you look.